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My suggestion is that you get some professional Christian counseling to help you get over this relationship. I hope that I'm not stepping on your toes, but in addition to counseling, my suggestion is that you put in the effort required to become the type of person that God wants you to date (a keeper). "You’ve probably heard the expression “He’s a keeper” or “She’s a keeper”, which means that a person has valuable qualities that a person would want in a boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife. From a Christian perspective, may I suggest that a keeper is a strong Christian, someone who: - keeps their Christian faith strong through daily prayer, and regular Bible study/church attendance - keeps trusting in Christ alone for their salvation and for their daily needs - keeps trusting God when the storms of life hit (problems, tragedies, etc.) - keeps God in mind when making any important decision - In other words, they seek God’s will for their lives. - keeps trying to obey the two greatest commandments, “love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength” and “love your neighbor as yourself.” (Mark, chapter 12, verses 28-31) - keeps trying to grow throughout their life (spiritually, emotionally, relationally, and intellectually) - keeps trying to display the fruits of the Holy Spirit - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control - keeps a group of Christian friends - keeps trying to control their tongue - keeps a positive attitude (cheerful, enthusiastic, looks on the bright side of things) - keeps themselves sexually pure from this day forward - keeps forgiving others - keeps in mind how much God loves them regardless of what they have done If a keeper decides to get married, they are someone who: - keeps trying to meet the needs of their spouse - keeps trying to communicate their needs to their spouse in a constructive positive manner - keeps trying to treat their spouse with a high level of concern and respect in both words and actions - regardless of what they receive in return from their spouse - keeps their lifetime commitment to their spouse In order to become a keeper, first of all, if you’re not already, you need to become a Christian (an explanation of how to do this can be found by clicking on the "how to become a Christian" tab at the website referenced below and an article about real love from the Christian Teen blog can be also accessed from the website’s homepage.) Next you need to make a commitment to the goal of becoming the type of person that God wants you to date by developing a close relationship with Jesus Christ - not a halfhearted commitment, but an “I’m going to do whatever it takes, nothing is going to stop me” commitment. Here are some suggestions of how to go about developing that relationship: 1. Get yourself a good Bible that is written for young adults. 2. Read it every other day at the least - start out in John and move to other books that talk about daily living and love - such as Proverbs, 1 Corinthians, etc. 3. Spend time in prayer daily including praising God; thanking God for all of your blessings; confessing your sins of thought, word, and deed; asking God to forgive your sins; asking God for help forgiving other people; asking God for wisdom to make good decisions that are pleasing to Him; asking God for strength to live your life each day the way he wants you to; sharing things with Him that are bothering or worrying you; and praying for other people. So the first step toward finding the type of person that God wants you to date and possibly marry is for you to take the time to become the type of person that God wants you to date. The second step is to prepare yourself for dating and marriage by reading some good books from a Christian perspective about dating and marriage. The appendix of Straight Talk About Dating contains a list of highly recommended books. After the second step has been accomplished, the next step is to participate in as many activities as possible with other people who are strong Christians. Sunday School class, church young adult group meetings and activities, church events, activities of a Christian organization, service projects, mission trips, Bible studies, etc., can all be great opportunities to get to know the type of people that God wants you to date without actually dating. (But be careful, some of the people that you will meet are simply masquerading as strong Christians.) It’s not going to be easy, but patience, perseverance, prayer, and participation in activities with other strong Christians will make it more likely that you will eventually find a person with whom you can have a lifelong loving Christian marriage." (Please remember that you want a 40, 50, or 60 year marriage - not a 5 or 10 year marriage.) Hope this helps! Copyright 2011